those better than me are dead so why am i alive 
as you light each morning and gild the swallow’s back gold 

because of her i try to believe you are not alone we are with you 

she gives you the water you ask so kindly for the song 
she asks me to sing you give us your hand on her heart 
no surface between us skin to skin 
in accord with the elemental properties of light fusion is union 
with the beloved in love in silence in joy 
the stars bring word 
of your grace in the darkness your body a hammer 

you live in our house 
like flood dawn 
but still i study so much the arts of unbelief 
o windburn and dustwork thirsty on my tongue 

                                                                 iv.10 
                                                                 —for Shūsaku Endō and Anna Akhmatova 

Shann Ray | Atomic Theory 432, iv.11
Contents | Mudlark No. 64 (2018)